Written by: Coach Lauren Bachand
Executive functioning skills are those higher cognitive skills that are required to successfully plan and carry out various actions during the day. They include attention, planning, prioritizing, and organization. They are used for memory, reflection, and inhibition control. But what exactly is the big deal with executive functioning? And why get a tutor that focuses specifically on planning and organization instead of your child’s “problem” subjects and poor grades?
Well to start, the reason for academic failure normally has little to do with a lack of understanding the information and more to do with the processing and storing of the information. Executive functioning skills, or EF for short, are those skills controlled by the frontal lobe of the brain. This is the last part of the brain to develop and mature, but it is also the most influenced during childhood development. Just like academic subjects in school, EF skills are learned, however they are not necessarily intuitive.
Let’s take a look at our lives as adults to help conceptualize what they are, and role our EF skills play in our daily lives.
For many of us, our day actually starts the night before. We might set an alarm, or check to ensure our alarm is set for the right time. (And, if you are anything like me- set a second, and a third. Just in case.) The next morning when you wake up, you prioritize the first things to do without much thought. Maybe one child struggles with getting up in the morning, or has to be to school earlier than the others, so you wake them first. You get dressed, set out breakfast, create your children’s lunches, or pull aside cash for hot meals. When you arrive at work you check your emails. You effortlessly categorize and prioritize which ones to answer before your 10 o’clock meeting. That afternoon you use Google Maps to determine the best route to get to your children’s school in time for pickup. You notice there is an accident, adjust your route and call the school to let them know you may be late. Once you arrive home you realize you are out of milk and write a memo to pick more up the next day. You look in the pantry, problem-solve, and cook dinner. You usher your children to bed, and then it is time to start all over again.
As an adult, you used your EF skills naturally and unconsciously. You adapt, problem-solve, and overcome obstacles with little second-thought. A child, especially once with learning differences which create EF deficits, may run into numerous bumps in the road during your day. They might forget to set their alarm the night before and wake up late, take too long answering emails and miss the morning meeting, see an accident on the route and not adjust or call the school to warn about being late, or they might forget to write the memo for milk.
If we were to translate this information to your child’s everyday life in an academic setting, you might notice that they forget to write down the deadline for an upcoming project. They might spend too long working on a homework worksheet that is only worth five points, instead of studying for a test that is worth 50 points. They might pick a topic to research that is too challenging, but they do not adjust the subject or ask the teacher for help. Or, they might forget to bring their textbooks home to complete their homework.
While your child’s academic coach will work with them on developing these skills during their sessions, it is also important they are developed daily around the house. So what are some things you can do to help your child develop and mature their EF skills, maximizing their future success? Well, to start the best (and easiest) way is to model the behavior yourself.
Here are four easy ideas to do together with your child:
Create a wall calendar for you and your child
Calendars are a great way for anyone to stay organized and on top of their game. It is the perfect way to foster planning, time management, scheduling skills, and foresight.
Begin with buying one large dry erase calendar (22in by 18in) for yourself and one for your child. These can be found on Amazon. Then, set aside one night at the end of the month, like the last Sunday, to sit with your child and schedule out the month in advance. Add work deadlines, appointments, and reminders on your calendar, while encouraging your child to fill in the deadlines for large assignments, tests, and extracurricular activities such as sports practices and tournaments on theirs. Then, create the habit of marking off each day together before going to bed. Children are visual learners, and being able to see approaching deadlines help them prioritize and schedule appropriately.
Create a nightly checklist for you and your child
Checklists are a great way to foster organization and other skills needed to prioritize tasks. It provides a sense of accomplishment, and help reduce stress and anxiety.
Begin by having you and your child create two or three goals you would like to complete by the end of the next day. These goals can be work/academic related, or they can be broader goals like remembering to wash the dishes or making a doctors appointment. At the end of each day, sit with your child and mark off which goals were met. For goals that weren’t met, ask questions such as “what prevented me from doing this goal today?” This tip can be used to foster a sense of accomplishment, be used as an incentive for “screen time” or another “fun” activity your child enjoys. If you and your child are competitive, this can become a fun game to see who can complete all of their goals each day.
Set out clothes for the next morning with your child
Preparing for the morning the night before fosters skills related to time management and organization. It reduces stress, anxiety, and frustration during morning routines.
Begin by checking the next day’s weather with your child. Now, with smartphones and in-home devices such as Alexa and Google Home- this step couldn’t get any simpler. Once you have determined the weather, work with your child to put aside an outfit. If your child has a uniform, this is the time for them to ensure all of the parts are washed and accounted for. If your child does not have a uniform, this is their chance to put together a cohesive, dress-code and weather appropriate outfit that matches their personality. While they put aside their outfit, you also have the chance to ensure you have everything you need for the next morning, potentially putting a small load in the washer and dryer before bed or ironing a pair of slacks. Once each of your outfits are picked out, you can each place them on the back of the bedroom doors using a hook.
Involve your child in cooking or meal preps
Cooking uses every EF skill there is. It fosters organizational, time management, working memory, and attention skills. Children must learn to use foresight and create grocery lists, gather and organize ingredients, time manage and prioritize what to cook when based on varying cook times, and attend tasks while cooking. Even better, it develops self-confidence in your child and a sense of accomplishment when they serve the meal to the family.
Begin by scheduling one day a week that your child is responsible for making dinner. I encourage parents to have their child make dinner since it is a meal the entire family can enjoy together. Once the day has been scheduled, help your child select meals you know they can accomplish with minimal assistance. Encourage your child to do as much of the meal independently as possible. These do not have to be complicated meals. Spaghetti with meat sauce, club sandwiches, baked ziti, hotdogs, or hamburgers are all examples of simple meals children can create with minimal assistance.
For more information about Executive Functioning, click here: https://www.understood.org/en/learning-attention-issues/child-learning-disabilities/executive-functioning-issues/3-areas-of-executive-function